It may surprise you to hear this, but Canadians who live with their partners are having less sex than ever before. There are plenty of culprits to point to, from busy schedules to mental illness. One struggle that plagues couples across the nation is sexual communication.
Sexual communication is defined as the degree to which individuals can express their preferences regarding sex. It can be overwhelming to learn sexy talk, especially if you're on the shy side. Luckily, this article will guide you in the right direction with some helpful tips!
Keep reading to learn more.
1. Statements Over Questions
It's easy to phrase your needs as a question because it feels less confrontational. With that said, your comfort during sex is a priority, and it's better to be upfront than to create any room for debate.
For example, if a position is not working for you, don't ask if it's time to try a new one. Let your partner know that the position isn't working, and it's time to try a new one. It may feel awkward at first, but sharing your preferences directly will give your partner the courage to speak up as well.
2. Don't Be Afraid to Laugh
What people forget to mention about sex is that it's funny. Not all of the time, but there are always moments. As much as you'd like it to be a steamy and serious action, finding the humour can defuse tension and allow both partners to relax.
Not every fantasy, position, or dirty talk is going to work—that's okay! If you make room to laugh, you'll be able to move on without the awkwardness.
3. Affirmation Is Key
When you or your partner share a need and each of you feels listened to, it can result in a lot of pleasure. What do you do at that moment? Let each other know that it feels good through affirmations!
Not only will you both feel great, but you'll show them that you appreciate the way they listen and communicate.
4. Watch Out for Resentment
One of the biggest mood killers in the bedroom is resentment. You should be enjoying sex, and if you're not, you may start to avoid or resent the activity, which can lead to issues with your partner.
Sex won't be mind-blowing every time, but if you're noticing a pattern of avoidance or discomfort when your partner wants to have sex, then it's time for a bigger discussion. You'll need to talk through it together.
Are there changes in your body? Do you want to spice things up? Talking through the challenges and being vulnerable will help you find a solution.
Sexual Communication in the Bedroom
It seems like a lot of couples have trouble talking about sex. It makes sense, and there's a lot more vulnerability in talking about sex than doing it. However, to build closer relationships (and have better sex), you need to learn about sexual communication. Although it may feel intimidating at first, following these tips can ensure that talking about sex is easier than ever before.
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